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Type of Weird Things that Cloud My Mind when I look Serious, Attentive, Concerned

wandering mind when talking serious
Perhaps, this is not the best thing to share. Being honest can hurt your own interests sometimes but then if I didn’t, I would be the real Me. So, here it goes – from trying to recall if I switched-off the electrical trimmer to whether I stretched properly when wrapping-up a light workout, from the poorly rendered hair color job to counting the number of pimples, from noticing the girth of your wrist to obsessing about if I consumed my daily vitamins or why my underwear has started creasing with more regularity these days…there are so many things that occupy my mind when you think I am being really attentive, actually listening to you!

My mind does not play tricks, I do..

This is not a case of attention deficit disorder. I have reasonably good concentration skills. I can listen to the most boring lectures with real, genuine interest. I can sit through staged speeches with the attention of a monk but when it comes to face-to-face interactions with real people, within inches from me, things pan-out rather differently.

Why are you talking to me?

For some reason when in-person conversations start, when the nature of a meeting is being seated across the table like matured adults and having a real dialogue, I have to observe and obsess about things that are not even remotely related to the actual topic. This is not an escape mechanism because this does not show-up exclusively when having uncomfortable conversations. It happens any time, without any pattern to map and predict as such.

While you were talking, I was away

I recall how my mind wandered deep into how the Kellogg cereal variety makes a good combination when sprinkled atop a serving of chocolate ice-cream. This is when a bunch of us were at a cafe and the conversations were about whether it makes sense to pursue a digital marketing course, the conversations peppered with many direct and indirect hints about domestic issues, love-life struggles, marital stories and ultra-lusty bosses. I have even noticed the stretch-mark type lines below the chin and the mind wandered away to some documentaries I had seen about Anorexia among the urban population.

Mind wanderings of a different type

There is another variation to this strange psychological behavior. There are instances where, when speaking at length, as a part of close conversations, I develop a certain type of eye-ache. Yeah, I cannot find a more appropriate term. It is not pain as such, nor an irritation. It is more along the lines of both eyes suddenly feeling heavy, weighing down the area between the corners of the eye and the nose. The result is a weird feeling that makes it difficult to have the ideal expressions, leaving very little room to hustle facial contorting to my benefit.

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