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DIY Anxiety Management: Need that Morning Sense of Calmness

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There is one challenge that has been constantly biting me – the inability to dress up in a calm, relaxed manner when getting ready for the daily drive that leads me to the office. Why? I am a self-confessed, highly embraced, chronic anxiety sufferer, and despite my best efforts, the smallest of changes in plans for the day, from a minor change of breakfast menu to running any small errand that might surface at the last moment, I tend to get a bit agitated. During winters, this feeling is somewhat controlled as I don't sweat as much but during summers, the feeling can be excruciatingly bothersome. To explain this better, I will need to divulge more details about my morning routine too, and the stickiness of it that is also a bit of a challenge. The thing is that I need a few minutes of working in the morning to get in the right frame of mind and soldier up for the day to follow. This is not about gaining muscle or fitting into a muscle tee. This is just a means to an end, as it helps me prepare mentally for things that might bother me and those that have already been marked as problems to solve. Whether I am expected to be a peacemaker or a troubleshooter at home or the office, the morning workout helps me be better at it. But working out comes with another challenge - the sweating and the time it takes to snap out of the exercising mode.
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I have tried morning meditation but I keep losing out due to being irregular. For me, starting the day without any anxiety spasms is necessary for a good day at work, for feeling better as the day unfolds, and for ensuring that I don't bring on any more anxiousness, especially the type that is uncalled for since the morning routine leading to the work-desk is common to all the millennials and does not seem to be a huge challenge for them. The smallest things that need me to rush things, like driving fast to make up for the minutes lost during the morning laziness can get me sweating. And I sweat rather profusely.

For me, the morning regimen should be all about happy vibes, kissing my wife, and saying something good about the day to unfold. However, with aging parents living reasonably far away, a work schedule where client communications are without a planner, and the constant stream of data via the smartphone don't allow this simple thing to happen, at least not regularly enough.

The massive list of events/things that tend to disturb the morning schedule:
- team members dropping messages about their leaves, late-comings 
- the morning tea being slightly undercooked or being too milky
- not finding something tastefully sweet along with the morning tea
- unable to deliver a big payload in the bathroom
- wet bathroom floors that need to be air-dried
- news channels barking about deaths and calamities
- realizing that lunch is going to repeat something from yesterday...hardly happens now!
- feeling bloated [happens a lot these days]
- feeling stuffed due to indulgences last night
- waking with thoughts running through the mind
- realizing I am again time-challenged for trimming facial hair
- unable to concentrate when doing the Om jaap
- waking up from twisted, weird dreams that are more of a suppressed emotion or thought
- anything financial that has gone wrong and needs to be corrected
- thoughts of 'should be in the gym'
- a floating thought that I am about to begin my day but not in the manner I wanted to 
- any look on my wife's face that says she is troubled or anxious...she is always my support, NOT always the other way around
- finding out that I have run out of my daily supply of meds that I carry to work
- unable to fit into my old denim or jeans that now seem loosely fitted
...and much more!!

During the summers, there is also the issue of leaving in time and finding the time to water the plants.  The soil dries up every day when the sun is that bright and missing a day means that a few of them, especially the coleus, will head to the heavens if not watered properly. This further creates a risk - what if while watering the plants, I step into the territory of pruning the plants that comes to me as a hard-to-resist urge? That takes up even more time! Recently, another paradigm was added to the already complex equation. Dropping my daughter at school has made the morning schedule a real challenge. I started waking up at around 5.30 and still, I don't find the time to manage it all. The workouts are now down to just about 20 minutes. Sometimes, when I am anxious, the OCD-ness of checking things before leaving home kicks in, and I have to spend those extra few minutes checking out things that literally don't matter at all.


  1. Jan 20th, 2018 - ran into a rickshaw puller today, not fatal or serious in any way, but that got my anxiety pangs started though there was no duel or argument...need to crunch something sweet to settle down :)

  2. There is another side to having a good breakfast and this is not about managing your calories or starting the day with a gastronomic bang - I have noticed that a good breakfast helps me deconnect with any pent-up anxieties, helping me start the day on a better note!


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